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Big decisions & changes

10/25/2012

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This post is both hard to write & exciting at the same time. It's hard because when things change at the drop of a hat it gives me little time to adjust. And I'm the kind of girl who needs to give myself time to accept change. At the same time this whole journey has been kind of on a whim moments so I can't say I'm completely surprised.

My doctor & I made the decision to hold off on the 3rd round of Bartonella treatment & instead begin treating the Lyme disease itself. This decision was not one made easily by me. It was something I prayed about for days & nights on end, and God laid the answer on my lap.

At this point the Lyme disease has infiltrated my brain (neuroborreliosis), my digestive system (resulting in loss of gallbladder function), my endocrine system (adrenals, thyroids, and major hormones), and my balance/visual system. The one place however that Lyme had NOT got to is my nervous system. That was typical of Lyme so I felt blessed it had not spread there. However, last week my right hand began spasms I have never felt before. Constant cramps that left me unable to type or use that hand properly. We ordered blood work in hopes that it was an electrolyte deficiency, but everything looked okay. These spasms also began in my left foot and I knew it wasn't good. I began to pray for an answer. As the spasms didnt stop & went into its 6th and 7th days I knew this was it. The Lyme has infiltrated my nervous system and I will be damned if I let it get any further.

My doctor, (who I can't sing enough praises about) completely had my back in urging and supporting me to table the Bartonella & get to attacking the Lyme itself. Every day & every minute I let this horrible disease manifest inside of me I am doing myself an injustice. I don't regret treating the Bartonella because I honestly do feel markedly better from the 2 rounds. I am thankful I could tackle that to an extent. Also, since this creates antibodies to the pathogens my body will continue to kill off Bartonella even when not actively treating it. So I believe I am a winner in that aspect.

So although I did not mentally plan for Lyme treatment I know I have to just jump in head first and start tackling it. The fear I felt when my felt my muscular system doing things out of my control was indescribable. I refuse to sit here & let this take over my body any longer. In this situation I think determination is overpowering the fear I have, and fueling me to get ready to take it on.

Xoxo,
Christina
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