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A Moment of Fear

6/17/2012

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They say when you experience a moment of fear that your adrenaline kicks in. In my case the only thing that sets in is panic & all rational thinking is gone. Last night I came face to face with my biggest fear. Something the size of a pencil eraser, something found by the millions all over the US... A tick. 

As I was laying down to go to sleep after an incredibly long and exhausting day of herxing, I began to answer a few last text messages. I was casually typing when I felt something crawl on my arm, so I brushed it off thinking it was a spider. I used my phone light to check out the bug, and much to my horror came face to face with a tick. It was no more than 6 inches from my face and my heart froze for an instant. Once my brain registered the situation I immediately went into panic mode. I threw the cover back and ran into my parents bedroom waking them frantically. By the time we got back the tick was nowhere to be found. Which was even worst. As I told my parents the story I just broke down sobbing from fear & the emotion of what happened. For most people a tick is just a tick, but for me it's the thing that took away my life & has given me lots of pain. 

I feel like my house is my safe place, and my bed is where I feel the safest from the outdoors. I have never seen a tick in real life that close up, so to find one now of all times on me & in my bed was almost too unbelievable to fathom. Once the shock left my body I was quickly remind that it was Satan's doing. After having one of the toughest days I've had in a while the icing on the cake was finding a tick that struck fear in me about getting reinfected or what could happen since now I couldn't find it. It's so typical for that to happen & test my faith when I'm at a low point. 

I'm sure I'm not the first Lyme patient who has found a tick on them & I'm sure I won't be the last. But this experience was a huge first for me. But the good news is that I survived.. And if it should ever happen again I will be more prepared to handle the situation 100x better. 

Xoxo,
Christina

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